Joy Dare Trial Run: October 3-5, 2021

Catching up from this week...

October 3, 2021: A GIFT CAUGHT, LET GO, MID-WAY

The evenings are getting shorter and I’m losing my perspective on time as we start to transition into fall. It seems like it should still be light until at least 8 pm. Tonight, after a nice conversation with a new friend about gratitude, I exited the building just before 7 pm and was surprised when we caught the end of a beautiful sunset. I love sunsets, but we don’t have a lot of colorful ones where I live. This caught me by surprise (ooh, a double “caught” reference) and I think all I could do was point and utter, “Look, gratitude!”

There have been a few times recently when I have let go of my inhibitions and taken a risk with difficult or awkward conversations. I don’t like to do things I’m uncomfortable with. Three of these conversations bring thoughts of gratitude now that they are done. A week ago, I told someone how embarrassed I felt about something I had said a month or two earlier. It wasn’t what I said, but it was that I bumbled my original words, and I didn’t convey my thoughts clearly. I left room for the words to be misinterpreted or take on a meaning that left me feeling like an idiot. I had spent months not wanting to make eye contact when I saw this person, but I finally let go of the inhibition, explained what I meant and how stupid I’d felt, and now it’s over. I’d lost months worrying, they didn’t skip a beat or think about it at all. Last month, I had some research on a topic I was unfamiliar with, which led to an awkward written conversation as I floundered my way around, not looking professional while pretending to know more than I did. Then today I had a different awkward conversation with someone on a topic I’m not secure talking about. But again, nothing but gratitude as I reflect on it. Sometimes I may feel like a fool, but for today, I’m thankful for people who can receive or witness when you let go and try to grow - and still respect you in spite of it. I'm grateful for the people in my life who are patient with me when I do this. 

Mid-way through the year you’ll find my birthday, it’s close to the date of America’s birth. I’ve had a love/hate relationship with my birthday for years. In 2009 I was on a team interviewing candidates to be our new youth minister when he mentioned using his birthday as a reset, or fresh start without waiting for the new year to begin. This was perfect since mine was mid-way and I adopted that process wholeheartedly. This year, mid-way through, I found a new appreciation as someone challenged me to think about what my birthday meant to me. It was a remarkable experience and so, at least for 2021, I am extremely grateful for the pause mid-way to learn an important life lesson.

NOTE: You can find the original blog post here:

https://thatresonates.blogspot.com/2021/07/summer-birthdays.html

 

October 4, 2021: 3 GIFTS REAPED

You reap what you sow. I’ve heard that all my life, so it makes sense it was the first thing I thought of with today’s prompt. I think generosity often looks like this. It’s not that being generous brings us something in return, but I think somehow our acts of kindness can circle back. When the quarantine began, I decided to pursue my interest in learning the ukulele and bought a beautiful, inexpensive, concert version. I started off strong with the online lessons and good intentions. Now it mostly gathers dust. I have pulled it from its case on occasion to test the sweet strumming sounds that bring images of palm trees, sand, and the ocean. My husband has also done this from time to time and recently expressed an interest in learning to play.

Last month I saw my ukulele in the corner, and it inspired me to take steps to find common interests and establish date nights with my husband. I didn’t want to spend much so checked in my neighborhood's free online group to see if someone had one to pass along. No luck there, so I turned to my neighborhood community group, looking for an affordable used one. I was connected to a neighbor who places new, refurbished ukes at reasonable prices. However, when I went to pick up our soprano ukulele, we were given two - along with a lesson songbook and a wonderful connection to someone in our neighborhood. His parting words the day we reaped that gift were, “Promise me you’ll laugh.”

As a young child, we had a small garden. I was probably about four years old, but I oversaw the thinning and harvesting of the carrots and radishes. For those unfamiliar with this process, they were grown from seeds and if you don’t create space between the plants, they will all be very tiny. As you remove the crowded ones, the others will produce a larger vegetable. I truly reaped a bountiful harvest, and some great memories with my Dad I will always be thankful for.

I am thankful for the times in my life when I reaped the benefits of people praying for me. I don’t often ask people to pray so when I do, I am either at the end of my rope and feeling desperate, unwilling to pray myself, or it’s something that matters so much to me I seek prayers from anybody who will pray. Right now, I’m particularly grateful for so many who have been praying for a family member we almost lost to Covid. Today, I’m also reminded of a few who have prayed for me at times when I had given up and I have to say, I’m overwhelmed with gratitude for those who carried me through in prayer.

October 5, 2021: 3 GIFTS RETURNED

My favorite gift returned is a person, I hope that’s not weird. In 2007, my best friend moved to Alaska. I didn’t realize she was my best friend until after she moved away. We had great hopes of meeting up for vacations, but life didn’t allow for that. I only visited once, and we met up a few times as she passed through town. Until 2020. It may have brought a pandemic, but it also returned my friend to Portland, at least until last month. Quarantine kept us apart for most of her time here, but I appreciate the handful of times we got to look each other in the eyes, laugh or cry, and share real-life stories together.

I’m not a huge fan of social media, but I am grateful that it has returned some of my life’s history to me, in the form of people. I went through a season of feeling unknown and fragmented about 2 years ago. I finally determined I was nostalgic for the familiar, and people who knew me, specifically those who knew me when I was younger. Social media was the initial connecting point as I started having conversations with two former youth leaders (one who happens to live in the same town as me, a thousand miles from where we once called home) and several other church contacts from my teen years. I found many friends from grade school through high school and some of my favorite people from my college days. Many of them are now a regular part of my life and I feel that the part of my life that was missing has been returned.

My prized gift returned was when I returned to a life of faith. I’m not going to tell you it’s been easy. I’m still learning what that looks like. But I do know I’m appreciative of a God that allows us to return. He also allows us to return again, and again if we need to. I think God would also call any prodigal a gift returned. 

#joydare

Joy Dare Trial Run: October 1-2, 2021

I’ve tried to start the Joy Dare for several months. It never clicked. Tomorrow I begin a 90-day commitment as part of an online course where I selected, “Write down one thing you’re grateful for” as one of my three daily action steps. As an overachiever, I thought this seemed like a great time to search for gratitude once again and try the Joy Dare prompts to find three things daily. I was kind of going for the “kill two birds with one stone” approach since I also opted to write 100 words each day.

I’m not sure why, but I think a natural mindset of gratitude doesn’t come easily for a lot of people. I trust and respect the first person who suggested I try doing this, but I didn’t believe it had much to offer me. Frankly, it seemed too extreme and kind of strange. Ok, it also seemed confusing, and I don’t like it when I’m not “perfect” at things. I’ve since been encouraged and inspired to do this by someone I haven’t even met, but God is mysterious in how He connects people these days. I read through a few of her posts and while I know I will never measure up to her understanding of gratitude, I’m ready to try.

October 1, 2021: 3 GIFTS ORANGE
As I sit at my desk, my first orange gift came to mind. To the left of my computer screen rests a small orange wooden block, approximately the size of an index card, and one inch deep. It was a giveaway in a neighborhood online group, and I fell in love with it. I try to imagine God speaking to me when I read the quote on it, “Simply amazing is who you are.” Most days I don’t believe it. Occasionally, I do. Today is the first time I felt grateful to have this block of wood as I try to remind myself of what God thinks about me. Hmmm…interesting. Maybe there’s going to be something to this Joy Dare after all.

A memory just flashed from years ago when Pastor Kurt was in my kitchen and asked me for an orange. It seemed odd since our ministry team was in my home for a meeting and we were about to have dinner. He took the orange and slowly peeled it to reveal the worthy fruit below the rind as he spoke. I don’t remember all the words, but I have often reflected on this object lesson where he tried to teach me it’s worth the effort to do the hard things and peel away the bitter parts of life to get to the best part. It made such an impact that I photographed the orange to remind me to never fear doing the difficult things.

In 2013, I heard Bob Goff speak for the first time. I was smitten. This man was vibrant and bold and spoke simple truths that resonated with me about loving God and loving people. One story he shared was about a woman who was using sign language to translate as he spoke to an audience. He loved the symbol for “awesome” so much that he stopped his speech to learn what it was. I appreciated his reminder to strive to be awesome and thought it was a worthy daily nudge to myself. I was delighted when I found a small plastic traffic cone at a dollar store with the word “Awesome” printed across it diagonally. I have one of those in my bathroom and one in my car to remind me to strive to be awesome.

I’m shocked but proud of myself for finding three gifts orange. I hope you might join me in trying this.

October 2, 2021: 3 GIFTS FALLING

While it’s not “falling” in the literal sense of the word, I am deeply grateful for more time spent “falling” on my knees in prayer recently. Before you think I’m showing off, or dare to compare yourself to what you perceive to be my prayer life, let me clarify that mine has again been almost non-existent for some time. More simply means there has been some in recent months. Even if it’s only a handful of times, it comes more naturally now when it does come. I am grateful for any time spent there.

I’m seeing the number falling on my scale, and that makes me feel some relief and hope. I have had several new or recurring injuries or ailments over the last four years that hinder my ability to do any physical activity, even as simple as walking. I am grateful to be able to move again, which results in a falling number and a healthier, more positive mindset. It’s easy to let our health issues weigh us down.

I easily associate falling with fear, as I’ve had some vertigo issues this year. To change how I look at that, I’m choosing to be grateful for the times when I did not fall even though my brain thought I was falling and spinning. I have been kept injury-free and my fear of falling has even taught me to ask for help a couple of times when I needed it. I’m trying to be grateful for learning to be humble.

#JoyDare

Vienna Waits

The year was 1977. Some of you reading this were old enough at that time to have some memories of what life was like. Many of you weren't born. I started to list some of the highlights, but it turns out 1977 was filled with so many monumental events I couldn't bear the thought of trying to select only a few to share. (Just for fun though, check this list out: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1977)

One of the things I most appreciate about music is its timelessness. I recently heard "Vienna" again by Billy Joel. Until then, it was probably 20 years since I had heard it. With life being so different than it was a couple of decades ago, I was able to hear the lyrics from a different perspective.

Life has certainly been moving at a slower pace in some ways, with staying home and major events and travel canceled. But, as we enter into a new school year, we've seen things pick up and it seems that some people may be looking to ramp up to that fast pace they once lived. 

When asked about this song, Billy Joel says it is a reminder to, "Slow down, look around you, and have some gratitude for the good things in your life." This resonated with me. Our minds are being filled with so much anxiety and negativity, but if we took the time to slow down and reflect on the good things, to truly appreciate them, I think the world would be in a better place. Certainly, we would each be healthier and happier.

I hope you'll take a listen and see if this speaks to you a little bit differently now. If you've never heard it, it's considered a classic by a legend. That's true, whether you're a Billy Joel fan or not. Sometimes you have to show respect, even when it's not your style.

Our health can be impacted very suddenly - what a great reminder of that when he sings about kicking off before we're even halfway through. Slow down, enjoy life and the lives of those near you. Choose thoughts of gratitude.

A couple of my favorite lines:

Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be before your time


Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright, you can afford to lose a day or two (oooh)
When will you realize... Vienna waits for you?

Listen here...

The Incorrect Use of Air

While driving around today, I found myself in a nice light mood in the midst of a busy schedule. This was primarily due to the positive music cranked up on my stereo, the sun radiating down through the sunroof, and the wind blowing my hair into a carefree mess. I remember thinking this was a nearly perfect moment. It didn't hurt that I had just finished up a delightful lunch at one of my favorite family-owned taco places, about a 20-minute drive east. Happy tummy, sunshine, music, wind, and a hint of the joy driving brings me. It was a good day.

As I was singing along with the lyrics to Great Are You, Lord, by Casting Crowns I was struck with the thought of how precious breath has become during this Covid-19 crisis. Many of us have taken breathing for granted, but this virus has created an appreciation like never before for so many. I began to sing along, "It's your breath, in our lungs, so we pour out our praise..."

I was reminded of a friend who challenged me two years ago to start walking more. I have a history of bronchitis and even walking pneumonia so I'm grateful for any winter I don't battle that. I was thinking that his push may have strengthened my lungs, and perhaps saved me from some breathing illnesses, as I haven't had any for the past two years. 

I also noticed I was able to really belt out the lyrics without feeling breathless. My heart turned my worship singing into a prayer of gratitude as I continued again with, "It's your breath, in our lungs, so we pour out our praise..."

Photo by Andraz Lazic on Unsplash

Then a bad driver interrupted me mid-sentence, mid-praise, mid-prayer. Suddenly the air (God's breath) in my lungs was being used in a different manner. Shall we call it, pointing out the error of the driver's ways? OK, it turns out the breath in my lungs can easily, and instantly be used to yell at people that cause an interruption to my driving. Yes, what they did was frustrating and no, I did not yell so they would know I was yelling at them. It was a quiet yell within my own vehicle. But wow, how quickly things can take a turn.

The thing is, it was still the same breath. Literally. I mean, I didn't even take in the next breath, I just changed out my words. Same air, but now used incorrectly. I wasn't proud of this but thought I can't be the only one. So, as usual, if it resonates with me I'll share it and hope it resonates with someone else also.

One More Thing...

Have you ever used the breath God gave you incorrectly? I already know the answer. But, I hope we can all feel a little challenged today to remember our purpose, and to use our breath for good.

Take care, and I'm always here to pray for you or listen if you have a need or request. You can reach out to me privately at loislynnflores@gmail.com or comment on this post.

Lois Lynn

Two Left Feet

“Dancing with the feet is one thing, but dancing with the heart is another.”

– Anonymous

“Dance for yourself, if someone understands good. If not then no matter, go right on doing what you love.”

– Anonymous

I have a good friend who used to be the children’s minister at our church. She can fully embrace the fun dance moves and arm gestures you often associate with kids and their musical programs. She looks fantastic doing it, she does not look ridiculous, and she enjoys it. I, on the other hand, can name a hundred things I’d rather do. A root canal comes to mind at the top of that list.

I don’t like to look ridiculous. I don’t want to be laughed at. I simply have no desire to participate in activities that make me look weird, even if I’m the only one who would see. If you haven’t seen the classic clip of the Elaine dance from Seinfeld, please go find it online. Jerry describes it as looking “More like a full-body dry heave set to music.” This is my fear if anybody ever saw me dance.

I grew up in a world without dancing so I don’t know how to allow myself to dance. I saw it on television with the Solid Gold Dancers and was charmed by Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly, Donald O’Connor, Ginger Rogers, Cyd Charisse, and the others of that era. The church we attended believed dancing was wrong, and so I never danced. One of my biggest high school regrets was that I never attended a prom. Between you and me, I hope that fantasy may come true someday.

I love music, and I have a natural inclination for rhythm and drumming. There’s a lot of hand drumming going on when I hear my favorite songs playing and even a lot of toe-tapping. Rarely will I break out into dance.

Until last Thursday.

I was attending a 2-day virtual leadership conference when the second speaker came out dancing. Even though I was home alone, my initial response was a verbal, “Good grief! I can’t believe we’ve got people like this speaking.” I was so grateful I wasn’t in a group because they would have seen the stoic and reserved me judging this speaker as I sat in my chair unmoving.

She kept dancing. I was in my small home office, still in my jammies because this conference started hours before my usual morning start time when something came over me. I stood up and I danced my heart out. I knew nobody could see me. The day before, I had prayed, telling God I would be open to whatever was put in front of me. So, I danced. And I liked it.

SIDEBAR: We would come to learn she was using this as an illustration about our comfort zones. We learned about the Behavioral Inhibition System, which responds to risk and keeps us from acting. I was so afraid of what I would look like all these years, that I refused to dance.

As she continued to talk about fears, she challenged us to see them as opportunities instead of obstacles. At the end of her presentation, the music was queued again. We danced again. I’m still grateful nobody was watching, and I don’t think I could do it with others around but it was a huge step toward where I want to be.

Check out her website here - Michelle Poler

One More Thing...

Think about your fears. What are you missing out on in life because of them? I’ll leave you with her last question to us, “What would you get uncomfortable for?”

Take care, and I'm always here to pray for you or listen if you have a need or request. You can reach out to me privately at loislynnflores@gmail.com or comment on this post.

Lois Lynn