Today is a day of celebration in our home, and especially in my own
life. Today is a one-year anniversary for me. Merriam-Webster defines an
anniversary as this: the annual recurrence of a date marking a notable event.
This one wasn't notable when it happened, it was just a day. There was nothing special
about it. But God made it notable and so I choose to celebrate it.
Let me back up one week prior in order to set the stage. We had hit
a wall and needed help and support so we sent an email out requesting prayers.
I won't list them all, but the "highlights" included combined vehicle
and emergency vet expenses of $7000 (almost 70% of a year's worth of my
paycheck), what we thought was a dying dog for what turned out to be 2 months, personal
health concerns, potential job closure/loss for Tracy, a dryer incident that
should have burned the house down, leaking plumbing through the floor, more
pending auto repairs and weeks of sleep deprivation from all of this.
This quote from that email depicts the weariness we were experiencing...and
probably lack of nutrition!
"We
are good, we know God's got this, regardless of how things play out but it
brought us to a grinding halt from fatigue - both physically and emotionally.
It took everything in our power to figure out how to make a peanut butter and
jelly sandwich for a while there. I don't remember the last time I felt that
discouraged and tired. It even took me about 3 minutes to figure out how to
return a call to someone as I stared at our Roku TV remote in my hand before I
figured out it wasn't the phone."
 |
| I did always enjoy the view, watching out for the first responders we ministered to. |
For
some this may have been the last straw. For us, it was relatively meaningless
as God had been telling me to leave that job for years and I wouldn't listen.
As I recall, we celebrated that night and I already celebrated the anniversary
of it today. Some of you reading this think I've lost my marbles while some of
you know me well enough to understand.
Why
am I celebrating a year without income, a year when we should have lost our
house or had to sell a car in order to survive, a significant change after
almost 18 years in one place? Because God loved me so much He led me to what He
had prepared for me.
Don't
get me wrong - this year has been tough in some ways. Finances have been
impacted as I'm now self-employed as a freelancer, working on projects for
several clients and filling in by selling things off as needed. Although technically, we've given away more than we sold. I would never make a good sales
rep! Our little dog remained extremely ill and misdiagnosed for months, leading
to emotional ups and downs and about 4 months without a solid night's sleep. The
rest...eh, it's just debt we hadn't planned on and so we deal with it one month
at a time.
Here's
the reason I celebrate - God has overwhelmed me during this past year. In the
brief moments living in the depths of despair, fear, and worry He is who I could
cry out to. It was God, the one true and constant companion and guardian who
was welcoming me into the plans He had created and been waiting to show me.
When I was content, it was Him who still waited patiently to show me what was
coming.
I
can almost imagine God giggling with anticipation and excitement as He
waited for me to move forward into this next season. He knew how incredible it
was going to be and what gifts He had waiting for me. He slowly unwrapped these
and presented me with His treasures for me. We have a new church home, God has surrounded
me with new people I never would have met, I'm writing again (with the
confidence that others have tried to instill in me), and he even paved the way to connect with many
I had lost contact with decades before.
This
year was mostly a time of recovery - it's no secret that there was a lot of
turmoil and trauma during the last 8 years at my job with no time to pause and heal.
I finally listened to the wise people God placed around me and at about month 8
or so, chose to finally become still so I could hear God's voice. Wow, was He
ready to speak! He spoke words of comfort, healing, love, affirmation, and
challenge. He spoke words of anticipation, delight, future plans, using my
gifts, and restoration. He guided so diligently when I would allow Him to, but
never forcefully. He waited for me. He waited a long time for me.
So
today, as I celebrate the anniversary of a job loss, and the rest of the
country starts to focus on thankfulness as they celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow, I share a bit of my journey to inspire you to listen to God's voice and not
be complacent. I dare you to say yes to God's calling and not be content if you
feel nudged. Mostly, I beg you to connect with people until you find the ones
that deeply love and care and will speak into your life.
Some
of you know my story and may be tempted to figure out just who did what, when,
etc. I urge you to hear me say that this celebration is about what God ADDED to
my life, not what I left behind. There are a handful of friends from the last
chapter that remain a part of my current chapter. My life has become a
beautiful blend of God's family.
I
cannot begin to share all of the ways God has taken care of me and shown me a
future I couldn't imagine. I don't want to name names because they are all remarkably humble. I do pray they know the difference they are making.
They are restoring me to the best of who I used to be, challenging me to grow
into who God created me to be and I will forever be grateful to have "Team
Lois" keeping me learning and growing.
I'm
not above begging you - it is critical to your life - I firmly believe it. Get
the right people around you! Get the people that you can cry out to when you
fail. Get the people that will pray for you. Get the people that will speak
God's word into your life. Get the people that love you. Get the people that
value you. Get the people that remind you of your purpose when you lose sight
of it. Get the people that will speak tough love and accountability. Get the
people that challenge you to try new things. Get the people that are
transparent. Get the people that will listen to you. Get the people who will
see you.
I'm
at a new church where I am unknown after 20 years in one place. That's tough.
But you know what? A few people call me by name already when I walk in. I am
seen. I have connected with someone from almost 40 years ago who is speaking
volumes of wisdom and encouragement to me and also invited and included me into
a Bible study small group. I am wanted.
I have a handful of wise men and women
who pray for me and speak counsel into my life. I am encouraged.
I have
wonderful people who have invited me into their home for a visit. I am
welcome.
I have someone who sees my desire to be more and is coaching me
through a book study. I am challenged.
This
year is a celebration because I can be sure of one thing as so vividly
evidenced through this last year. I am loved. I am loved beyond measure. I am
loved not because of my own doing, but because I am special to The One.
Please
join me in this celebration as you are also loved and wanted, seen, and welcome.
I didn't accept or believe that easily. To some reading this that are a part
of this new season, you're in shock that these thoughts are beginning to be
accepted by me. This is joyous and terrifying at the same time. So many of us
have felt the opposite for so long but maybe it's time we listen to the people
trying to show us we matter.
I
was never defined by my job. It used to be a calling but that changed ages ago.
You are not defined by your job either, or anything else. We are all defined by
who God says we are. I promise to try to remember that if you will, too.
Happy
Thanksgiving Eve to you and Happy Anniversary to me. Thankful to celebrate this
day and I hope this story encourages you to keep going.
One More Thing...
If you struggle with belonging, please reach out to me. This is only about 5% of the story.
Take care, and I'm always here to pray for you if you have a need or request.
Lois Lynn
Lois Lynn
